Sunday, 29 January 2012

7 ways Brazil will ruin your children

I love Brazil!
Brazil fan in Paranapiacaba
Although I was born in Canada, I only spent the first 7 weeks of my life there, plus a few return trips over the last few years.  Generally, Brazil's a great place to be a kid. (São Paulo isn't the best place in Brazil to be a kid, though - no freedom, no space, lots of pollution, and insane traffic.)   But getting back to the good points of life in Brazil:  people are extra-nice to children (and their parents) here, I never get dirty looks for being noisy, and I don't get kicked out of restaurants, concerts, and bars just because I'm underage.
Dancing with Tia Elena, who always takes me to fun places!
The New York Times said to visit this bar in the Barra Funda neighbourhood of São Paulo, so I did!  (Well, to tell the truth, I went there first!)
Bar by the beach in Iguape 
Plus, I've got the best nanny in the whole world, a ton of cousins and aunts and uncles, and at least a dozen neighbourhood kids who regularly knock on the door to play with me.    (No need to get driven around to play dates and sign up for a million organized kids' activities...the fun comes to me!)
The neighbourhood gang celebrating my birthday last year
What more could you want when you're three?
Checking out plants and bugs in an abandoned lot with my biologist buddy, Oliver
But, all this fun comes with a few drawbacks.  So, for my other dual-nationality friends (that's you, Oliver, Sophie, Sophia, Davi and August, plus all my virtual friends from the blogging world), and parents of half-Brazilian kids, prepare yourselves!  Brazil may turn out to be a bad influence on you, too.  Here's why:

1)  I like to sing Luan Santana, Michel Teló and evangelical pop at the top of my lungs.

2)  I think a meal without meat and rice isn't real food ("Mãe, não quero isso, quero comiiiida!")  Plain white rice, however, is delicious!

3)  I regularly stay up until midnight. (This is my parents' fault more than Brazil's, of course.)

4)  I think that putting salt on or in random things, like oranges or milk, is a good idea.  (This may be because I'm three, not because I'm Brazilian...but I think the two are related.)

5)  I speak broken English, or none at all.   (The video below shows me at the height of my English-speaking abilities, on the eve of returning to Brazil after 6 weeks in Canada.)  I refer to cupcakes as "bolinhos" and regularly mix up "oatmeal" and "omelette"  (leading to a crying fit the other day when I discovered that I was being served omelette, when I was expecting oatmeal!)

6)  I am confused by household appliances, demanding long explanations when I see a dishwasher or dryer.

7)  When left alone for a few minutes at my grandma's house, I take advantage of my freedom to eat salty snacks, put on my cousin's high heels, and watch really, really bad television.

Caught!  (Yes, it's Faustão....)


Born Again Brazilian said...

She is so adorable! Sophia would put salt on everything if I let her.

Matt, Kara, Hunter and Cavan said...

So funny!!!

Carol Valente said...

Very nice lol :)

Anonymous said...

Além de linda, a Elis é genial!!! Adorei ler! Uma obra-prima da literatura, e merece ser divulgada=)

Beijo de Vancouver, com saudades!


Daniela Caielli said...

Hahaha... Elis é o máximo! E quanto às más influências, devo dizer que até o chato do Teló ganha algum charme na performance de Elis. beijos!!!

Jaime said...

She is super cute!!!

Elis said...

Thanks for the comments, everyone! I'm a bit slow on this blogging thing, aren't I? Maybe now that I'm 4 I'll be a bit faster on the computer!

Elis said...

@@Sophia and Sophie's moms - do you have the same problems? Or is it just me that picks up all the bad influences? ;)

Elis said...

@Kara - whenever I read your blog it hits me just how different a life Elis would have if she were in the Yukon...sometimes I show her pictures so that she has some idea about normal Yukon kid things, like playing in the snow!

Elis said...

@Carol, Dani e Maíra, obrigada pelos elogíos...estou ficando muito mal acostumada! Dani, só piora meu repertório, agora o meu hit preferido é aquele "tche tche tche re tche"...mais chato ainda! Maíra, saudades de você também...quando vier para o Brasil, nos avise!

Anonymous said...

I just saw this video for the first time!!! I'm thrilled to be able to buy Elis's love with baked goods! ;)
Beijos from Montreal.

Elis said...

How did I not see YOUR comment until now? She still talks about those cupcakes today! Clearly they were good. Oh, and she saw Pringles in the grocery store the other day and remembered - even though I don't think she's seen them since then, over a year ago - that they are the chips she ate on the airplane to Canada. Bizarre.